How To Be A Man Magnet
You know the story, you are spectacular, your friends all tell you they can’t believe your single because you are so great…
Guys are either not interested or drop like flies as soon as you start getting to know them
The internal dialogue begins; what is wrong with me…. Nothing!
All men are crazy… Or maybe I’m crazy…
I totally need a man… Screw men, I’ll just buy a cat.
I hate cats! I’ll buy one anyway.
What’s wrong with me???
Here’s a news flash for you, we are all slightly crazy because we have all grown up with a slightly different interpretation of the world around us.
What we think is ‘normal’ is someone else’s ‘crazy’, for me it’s normal to do the dishes after each meal, people around me tell me I’m nuts and should leave it until the end of the day.
For me it’s normal to talk about things that are bothering me before they become an issue, to others that’s high maintenance.
Until we begin to realise that we are all slightly nuts then we will constantly be struggling to fit in with other people.
Now by no means have I got my sh!t together but I’d love to share a little bit about how I managed to shift my mindset from struggling to believe there was anyone out there for me to snagging a pretty special fella.
When I was young I spent most of my life being told to calm down. By no means to I begrudge those who told me this, because I was a very boisterous young child, however what I interpreted this to mean was that my personality couldn’t be loved.
I spent the best part of my late teens and early 20s responding to almost anyone who asked me on a date, fully believing that they we’re seriously deluded for doing so.
Believing that I was not worthy of being loved for who I truly was I found myself moulding myself to be more like the guy I was dating. I liked his music, his friends and his hobbies. I ever he showed any dislike for anything I did I would go into a downward spiral of self doubt.
I spent a lot of time in relationships that made me feel sub par and couldn’t understand why I couldn’t ‘find a man’ who suited.
I didn’t have a ‘list’ which he had to adhere to, and in my opinion I was fairly low maintenance.
This was one of my problems.
The thing is, until I worked on my mindset I was never going to find a man.
The age old saying of you have to love yourself before someone can love you was absolutely true. I used to roll my eyes at this, but the truth is I was just not ready.
It wasn’t until I started figuring out the stories I was telling myself about who I was and how relationships are hard that I began to meet people who truly complimented me.
I spent A LOT of time unravelling my value proposition, what it is that I offer to the world. All my fabulous, quirky outrageousness… Loved and presented to the world in full.
People were right in someone way, I was going to need someone special to love me, but you know what? There are 7 billion people in the world, there have to be at least 1000 who would love me, push me, support me and stop me from eating chocolate!
When I realised what I offered I designed a guy who would want what I offered, a HUGE shift for me… He had to be fun and outgoing, entrepreneurial, athletic and enjoy adventure. He had to be even headed to deal with my emotions calmly and kind to look after my soul. I would love him to be handy and have common sense, and if he was photographer then that would be amazing, cause I hate taking photos!
One I had this written out in purple sparkly pen I felt at ease, happy and ok with being single. I found myself enjoying life more and doing what I loved without constantly looking for a guy… And then he came into my life.
Unexpectedly, wonderfully and freakishly familiar.
So the moral of the story is: yes you are crazy.
Wonderfully, fabulously crazy and that is perfect. It’s not that you have to change it’s that you have to love who you are!
Spend some time understanding the underlying stories you tell yourself about who you are and how you are in relationships.
Figure out your true value proposition and what kind of people will be perfectly complimented by your version of crazy and then start living a life you love…
You are wonderful, you are worthy of being loved, and I love your crazy!
Are you ready to take your good life to great? It starts with your mindset and that, my courageous friend, is my game. Pop your details in below and let’s have a seriously successful time together!